Psst…c’mere. Listen to me. You don’t have to be just what you are. Did you know??
In recent years I’ve thought a lot about who/what I am.
A question I think everyone has asked themselves one time, multiple times, ALL the time. It’s a tough one, not easily answered or maybe easily answered depending. Bottom line, it’s part of the “being human” experience that all at once frustrates, excites and confounds me.
Jumping into the way-back machine I remember asking myself this as far back as junior high; am I a cool kid? If not, do I care that I’m not? Do I want to put energy into this particular thing? Will this thing then be who I am to everyone else? Maybe I was more introspective than most 13 year olds…
But I also knew that finding my “thing” was important to me. Figuring out what I wanted to be took up a lot of my thinking.
As a culture, we ask this question all the time to young kids, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”
From age 4 to 7 I always told people I wanted to be a dolphin trainer. Still wouldn’t mind that actually. I wonder if we ask this to gauge a kid’s personal interests or just to see what sort of answer we might get; my mom would tell people she wanted to be “7 brides” so yea, kids say the darndest things.
We are trained to be thinking about our future selves from a very young age. And frankly, I think the percentage of kids growing up to be what they said they were going to be is pretty low. I don’t see a lot of princesses, dolphin trainers, Zamboni driver (my brother’s go-to response) or superheros around, which is kind of a shame if you ask me.
So what is our obsession with it? Why do we start the questioning so young? Why can’t we just figure it out as we go? Is it our American obsession with productivity and drive and ambition? Or is it a need to feel a part of something and for that something to be a part of our identity? Maybe a big ‘ole combo of it all…
This is what I’ve come to realize and what I hope I pass onto my babies: BE IT ALL.
Want to train dolphins while wearing a tiara and writing a book? Cool.
Want to deliver babies while playing the piano and playing roller derby? Awesome.
Want to teach kids while training for a triathlon and also developing the next great website? I love it.
Do you love it and want to do it? Do it. Be it.
Too often, I think, we get caught up in our definitions and it somehow puts a stop to the other facets of ourselves that would feed our mind and soul.
Let’s look at it as a resume of sorts; what do I bring to the table, what do I have in my arsenal that can contribute in some way to my life and the lives of others? Not in order of importance mind you, I have a hard time being a “Mom” above all else because, ahem, there is far more to me than my ability to procreate and then keep those humans alive.
So here’s Katie in bullet point form:
– Theatre kid
– College graduate
– Marketing professional
– Make Up Artist
– Sales professional
– Educator
– Runner
– Writer (simply because I put words to paper, or screen, whatever)
– Mother
– Wife
– Daughter
– Sister
– Cousin
– Niece
– Household Manager (lol, not great at it but the structure is still standing)
– Friend
– Forward Thinker
– Creator
– Believer
Let’s not forget it’s not always a degree or certification or W-9 that makes you something. We should all aspire to be friends and thinkers and creators and believers. These should be our baseline frankly.
I’m determined these days to continue to be it all.
Every idea, every notion, every title, every position you take in life can be, and should be, something that adds to the person you are. They don’t all have to be perfect, far from it! They should be in constant evolution, forever changing as you and the world around you ebbs and flows.
And the little people watching us evolve? They need to know that it’s not about what you want to be when you grow up, it’s about ALL the things you want to be when you grow up.
Be it all little guys, because you absolutely can.
Now go make your list…